Everything is just an illusion anyway

There was a time when I was so overwhelmed and distraught by conditions in my life-- over which I had no control --that I actually lost big chunks of my waking hours. 

In fact, I don’t remember days or even weeks during that time. 

My marriage was falling apart—truth be told, it was over.  I took it very hard.  I was very young and very hurt and emotionally devastated. 

I had a seven-year old to care for and because of my emotional state, wasn’t capable of caring for myself, let alone a seven-year old.

However, I didn’t think I had a choice in the matter. 

After all, there was a child depending on me.  I carried on, went into what you might call auto-pilot for the sake of my daughter, and existed in a sort of half-life for a while. 

Finally, one day, while walking to work, I heard a bird singing. 

Then I noticed flowers that were growing in gardens along the way, and realized the sun was shining and the sky was blue. 

 My sepia-tone world was transformed to Technicolor. 

 I felt like Dorothy entering the Land of Oz.  As emotionally bruised and battered as I still was, I had a rather enormous realization.  Awakening from my pain in such a beautiful way was truly a blessing.  After a time, I realized I was doubly blessed, and that sense of gratitude has stayed with me ever since.

Recently, someone reminded me of how important it is to give thanks even when you think you have nothing to give thanks for. 

 Hearing this, reminded me of a time when I did just that.  I gave thanks for awakening to life.  I was in pain and I gave thanks anyway and I continue to give thanks every day. 

It’s been 40 years since my divorce.  I’m still grateful for my awakening. 

I’m a relatively new student in The Course in Miracles, but anyone who has studied that course knows it teaches that everything is just an illusion anyway.  The only thing that’s real is love. 

Love leads to forgiveness. 

Love leads to gratitude. 

God is love and love is all there is. 

That old saying, “We’re spiritual beings having a human experience” is much easier to say than to live.

And, because I can be categorized in that statement, sometimes the going gets tough for me.  When that happens, I remind myself to keep it simple and bring it back to gratitude. 

Whatever is happening in my life I say to myself, “embrace it and be grateful anyway . . . forgive yourself and be grateful anyway. . . love yourself and be grateful anyway”.  Wake up in the morning and be grateful . . . go to sleep at night and be grateful. 

 Whatever is happening in your life right now, whether you see it as good, bad, beautiful, or ugly, love yourself, forgive yourself, and be grateful anyway.

Lesson . . . I am much stronger than I ever thought possible, and I am blessed with the awareness of all of God’s blessings.

Thank you God; thank you God; thank you God, and so it is.

---Kate Morgan for Unity of Charlotte